i headed home, tipsy on chimay, having made a decision on a plan of attack, and fully prepared to carry out said plan. but the train ride home was long enough for me to reconsider: masturbate, exercise and binge-eat all at once.... i decided to consult doogie one last time via email before undertaking project (because project it would be).
his response: BAD MENTAL PICTURE. vexed, because that does not help, i replied: okay, but do you recommend, and any suggestions (combos/variations)? i have not heard back from him. in fact, he has not appeared on gmail, facebook, etc., since.
what to do, what to do.... i wait.
Showing posts with label masturbating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label masturbating. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
wannabe doctor responds! with cure for insomnia?
turns out doctor-boy (see recent ellroy/gretzky posts) did not find my words offensive, but is merely slow: it took him 8 days to read 2 pages--of dialogue (i.e., 2 minutes of reading, as you know/saw). his response: 'HAHAHA! Did you really write that--for me? Methinks you are a genius!' he then insisted we meet. naturally, i obliged this new fan (one never wants to irk/offend a new fan, to avoid any potential obsessive/crazed reaction).
i must confess here that i had an ulterior motive, aside from the normal man-related. my insomnia (that i've mentioned oft) is being an increasingly intolerable whore, so i regarded this as an opportune time to pick a professional's brain (albeit not bona fide, but wannabe). so, over cheap shitty beer (i'd planned to pick up the tab in exchange for worthy advice), i asked the young doctor his recommendations. his response: 'exercise like really hard, then eat until you think you're gonna barf, and then masturbate.' i totally did not expect this from little doogie, and it caught me so off-guard that i paid for his beers anyway.
the next night, while out for yummy belgian beer, i relayed the story to my friend, who said it was sound advice, in his opinion. he added that masturbation always makes him hungry, so suggested adjusting the order to: masturbating, eating, exercising. i thought it over, and since my case extreme (alas, tis 4am as i write this), i've decided why not all at once. (update unlikely, so to not gross out readership.)
i must confess here that i had an ulterior motive, aside from the normal man-related. my insomnia (that i've mentioned oft) is being an increasingly intolerable whore, so i regarded this as an opportune time to pick a professional's brain (albeit not bona fide, but wannabe). so, over cheap shitty beer (i'd planned to pick up the tab in exchange for worthy advice), i asked the young doctor his recommendations. his response: 'exercise like really hard, then eat until you think you're gonna barf, and then masturbate.' i totally did not expect this from little doogie, and it caught me so off-guard that i paid for his beers anyway.
the next night, while out for yummy belgian beer, i relayed the story to my friend, who said it was sound advice, in his opinion. he added that masturbation always makes him hungry, so suggested adjusting the order to: masturbating, eating, exercising. i thought it over, and since my case extreme (alas, tis 4am as i write this), i've decided why not all at once. (update unlikely, so to not gross out readership.)
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