scent of a woman

last night, i had the misfortune of running into an old friend who coerced me into staying out til all hours of the morning. you know the type: bibulous, loud and sloppy, insistent on both paying and ordering, arm tight around shoulder (to make sneaky getaway most difficult). today, i had tickets to a noontime matinee and, waking late, had to go straight from bed to theater, hair a bird's nest, reeking of booze. and what do you know? i met a scraggly musician dude. he'd looked about himself, sniffing like a dog, and when his eyes met mine, he intuited right away that it was i who reeked! at first mortified, i was pleasantly surprised when he took the seat next to mine. afterwards, we got gelato and walked in the park. so, today i learned that it's not just the smell of bacon that attracts man. and what a relief, for whenever i've carried said meat in pocket, i've aways caved, consuming it before ever running into man, for i am only human, and bacon yummy.